News From Jamaica: Rastafari Accused of Molesting Goats ( bah - hahahhh )

Police in Spaldings, Jamaica, are appealing for witnesses after a Rastafari was spotted hovering around a goat’s rear end on Friday.

A police constable and two other witnesses spotted the dodgy looking Rasta standing behind the she-goat with his shirt suspiciously un-tucked from his trousers. When the copper shouted to the Rastaman to clarify what he was doing, the Dread turned on his heels and scarpered sharpish.

Police managed to find the Rastafari the following day (Saturday), and questioned him about why he ran. The Rastaman explained that he only ran because he was smoking a marijuana cigarette and thought he would be in bother for it.

A witness came forward later that day to say they had seen the Rasta having sex with the goat, and the goats owner says that after examining his goats vagina he’s convinced someone has been having nookie with it. ( bah - hahahhh )

“The goat was examined by the owner and it was discovered that the vagina was swollen and had some bloody substance coming out of it.” The witness told the Jamaica Star

“Dem man ya fi chase out of our community. We do not want any goat molesters in our community, because we want to know that the mutton we are buying to consume is clean,” the angry citizen furthered.

The witnesses have yet to make official police statements, once they have been officially interviewed the Rastaman will be charged with bestiality.

Comment below or discuss on our bizarre forum: 

So, by now we trust you’ve seen the video. If you have, we don’t even need to explain the title of this post. If you’re still unsure of the reason for and a little creeped out by the title of this post, then you haven’t seen the video. Those feelings of being creeped out are about to get a lot worse.

That’s the kind of thing you watch and just aren’t immediately sure how to feel about it. We still aren’t completely sure. Luckily for us, Kevin Klein of TSJ and Playboy Morning Show fame had an opportunity to talk to the girl behind this video. Her name is Laura Martinez, and her vagina ain’t handicap. Check out the interview at the link below.

An Interview With the “Vagina Ain’t Handicapped” Girl

Posted 6/27/2011 at 9:30 am by TSJ Staff

So, by now we trust you’ve seen the video. If you have, we don’t even need to explain the title of this post. If you’re still unsure of the reason for and a little creeped out by the title of this post, then you haven’t seen the video. Those feelings of being creeped out are about to get a lot worse.

That’s the kind of thing you watch and just aren’t immediately sure how to feel about it. We still aren’t completely sure. Luckily for us, Kevin Klein of TSJ and Playboy Morning Show fame had an opportunity to talk to the girl behind this video. Her name is Laura Martinez, and her vagina ain’t handicap. Check out the interview at the link below.

PBMS LauraMartinez VaginaAintHandicapped by Adam Tod Brown

Czech Senate passes penal code

Prague - The Czech Senate today in accordance with expectations passed a new penal code that lowers the age of criminal liability and legal sexual intercourse to 14 from 15 as of next year.

The Senate proposed no modifications to the legislation which the lower house passed late last year. Nevertheless, Justice Minister Jiri Pospisil, who worked the bill out, has promised to help prepare an amendment to it to change the age limit that has been criticised by some politicians and experts.

"Either the deputies or the government will submit a draft amendment to parliament, that would open the issue of the age limit for both legal sex and criminal liability," Pospisil (Civic Democrats, ODS) said.

The promise was demanded by ministers for the junior ruling Christian Democrats (KDU-CSL) as a condition for them to support the penal code. In the vote today, the draft was supported by 74 of the 76 senators present. The legislation is to modernise the Czech penal law and replace the code from 1961, which tends to protect collective-related values," said Pospisil. The new code puts emphasis on the "protection of life, health, dignity, honour and property of our citizens," he said.

The code, which is yet to be signed by the president, divides criminal deeds into crimes and offences. The latter category comprises the deeds punishable with five years in prison at the most.

Prison punishments for serious crimes against life and health are toughened, becoming three to five years longer. The institution of home internment is introduced for minor offences, partially replacing suspended sentences. The code also reckons with the establishment of special institutes for sexual deviants and psychopaths. It introduces a number of new crimes such as stalking, certain types of doping in sport and negligence towards animals.

It distinguishes murder from intentional killing, for the sake of women who killed their partners who tyrannised them.

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Senát schválil nový trestní kodex